Every breath you take, every move you make….

Safety, and the desire for safety when expressed as fear, is an insurmountable prison, but Maslow had it right, safety based in personal responsibility and love is the foundation upon which true friendship grows.  Some lives begin with every breath and every move monitored just to keep the breath and movement continuing. These are the lives I serve professionally. Some lives end with an ever increasing need to have others meet their basic needs, this is where I also serve. I am taking away so much from this week in Glendale. Synchronicity, or as my friend James would call it ” signal,” brought another nurse and her husband to my table at this years Nurse appreciation dinner. My company, MGA, may be completely patient focused,  but it treats its...

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Skipping over the ocean, like a stone

I was never as good at skipping rocks as my sisters, even as an adult to get three bounces gives me the woohoo thrill my sister chirped out when five became six, but that’s alright with me, I still love the process. First I scan the water, diverted from the acquisition by dragonflies and water-skippers, dragon flies before transition, and minnows. I love the way minnows dart in at my feet to search for food; my feet are slowly turning blue in the coldness of the stream, seperating themselves numbly from the experience. My eyes find a roundish flat stone. I pick it up, weigh it in my palm, feel for the necessary smoothness, discard it as too rough. Choose another, not as flat; and it is also discarded as too heavy. Usually the third or fourth one will sit...

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Broken windows and empty hallways, a pale dead moon in the sky streaked with grey

My week (since last Friday) contained almost no time except sleeping and driving when I was alone. It has been tremendously fun. It has included group activities, girl time, dates, doctor appointments, class and 41 hours of work. I have been reminded that I am truly alive and still beautiful, and conversely reminded that I  am small in the grand scheme of things I am full Yet I am so drained. It was a rough day at work as well. Gratitude list and some meditation is mandatory. Introvert recharge is under way. In the meantime, may human kindness rain down in your life too!

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Slip sliding away, slip sliding away….

Like most people, I am afraid of certain things.  I am afraid of rejection. To me rejection looks like being laughed at, it is me being less because I am fat,  it is being told I am acting stupid or more often told I am acting  “too smart”. I know I am not unique in that, because of my interests – comics, legos, science, math, sci-fi, games – many of my friends have social anxiety issues; because of my choices, body build and medical challenges, I am not naturally graceful nor am I thin; because of my broad travel and other non-geek interests – philosophy, social action, music, fine arts, classic literature, poetry – my friends and my knowledge base and perspective are frequently disparate. It is very easy for me to use my...

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What’s New PussyCat?

Though I would do a bit of an update, hope to get a new recipe up here this week-end, I am going to back up to red and start over in rainbow order because, well, because if you actually know me you will understand, if you don’t actually know me yet, give it a couple more entries and you will understand. Besides, that gives us another shot at green. So training is postponed for one more week, trying to just let it be and walk through the delay; sort of like my personality the quirky blood cells are making the normal blood cells chase shiny things instead of you know, carrying oxygen, clotting my blood, etc. Hope to be in the pool again by the week-end and running after my follow-up tests. Meantime eating arugula and blueberries and all the yummy plant stuff I...

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Everything is Beautiful, in its own way

So today is truly a “Tale of Two Cities” time. The best of times; 1.  well I love my job, I love helping families become the experts on their own children while providing support and care for these little babies. And I work for the best company in the Valley for this kind of care. 2. I still have a roof over my head, food on my table and beautiful golden furry friends to love on. 3. I have amazing human friends who have provided everything from prayers and emotional support to acupressure and a stunning new haircut, and have made loans or donations making it possible to have #2. 4. Thanks to saying yes to a Sunday shift, financially I am able to take two days off and recover a bit from this last round of medicine which means I can take the medicine...

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Celebrate good times, come on, this is your celebration

So my friend’s results came back negative for cancer!!!Wooooohoooo! One more person spared the indignities and inconveniences of the Big C! *insert party balloons, dancing, and lots of good pies*  We both love pie. Well, we both love a lot of the same things but pie has a special place in our loves. I won’t share other of the numerous items she has good taste in because that would lead to “outing” her from anonymity which is not my place. But anyway, my gratitude cup overfloweth! Okay, next up my wonderful and magical friends (or faithful, whichever moniker you prefer) let’s send that energy to my other wonderful woman who needs some speed healing so they can start her cycles of systemic poison (otherwise known as chemotherapy) so...

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