I have a new gym membership. I really got it for the pool. When I started 5 years ago or so I was literally afraid to put my face in the water, then I got here. 2012-05-17_07-29-53_141. That length I am struggling with in the video is 1/4 of a lap.

I swam 4 laps, only one without a break. Sunday I start C25K, yet again. May have a triathlon in my future , may not. Biking is my bugaboo. That is me learning to ride a bike also just a few years ago.

Then stuff happened and it became easier to make excuses than changes and decided to accumulate instead of experience, and watch or read about life instead of live it.

Now there were some reasons I had to do less for awhile, and celebrated my release to push my limits again by taking my date to the gymn.

I am a long way weight, strength and endurance from where I left off, but feel great this morning if more aware of some core muscles I wasn’t using before yesterday.

Strength and endurance are higher hurdles after 55, and when the scale once again tops 200 lbs.

But the biggest hurdle I jump as a SOFT geek (Slow Old Fat Tryathlete) is never the cardiovascular challenge of age and chronic illness, my love of food and crazily thrifty genes; it’s the challenge of allowing myself to look foolish, to be last in competitions , and still repeatedly show up with 100% effort when it’s not my primary skill set.

Who else has to play against the voices from their past (and now luve in their head) that told them to stick to what they were good at and laughed at clumsiness, size and struggle to learn?

But what I know is that I start where I am, and just keep moving forward until I get somewhere I need to go.