Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away

I do believe in yesterday, yesterday is the place where seeds were planted for today’s harvest, where mistakes were made for today’s lessons, where choices and promises were made that I honor, I do believe in yesterday. I learn from yesterday, I cherish yesterday; I do not regret yesterday.

I also believe in tomorrow; tomorrow is the place where adventure still waits, hope often dances and dreams do come true. I believe in tomorrow, I do not fear tomorrow.

I live here in today. In this moment, the past cannot be changed, and the future is the flower of today’s tilling, planting and fertilizer. So today I will dig until my back aches, throw all the seeds of compassion and gratitude I can, laugh heartily, love easily, forgive even quicker and if I find today is a little more full of shit than other days, I am going to work it into the flower beds thanking the cycles of life that produced it.

So has anyone noticed that I still let you know what I am listening to when I write my blog? I do this sort of augury where I ask the universe what I need to know today and then pick an artist, genre, etc, and hit random. Today is brought to you by the Beatles.

Cover Song (what colors my life) today was “Yesterday” and the cross (what helps or challenges me) is “Let It Be”, my foundation is “Eight Days a Week”, more recent past “Get Back”, my future is “Love Me Do,” and far future is “All You Need is Love”; for self I have “Paperback Writer,” and my relationships is “Penny Lane,” for hope and fears I have “We Can Work it Out,” and final outcome is “From Me to You.”

Totally fits, too. There is a shadow hanging over me, yup, in all this I am also mourning the fact I met someone who I fell head over heels with who was anything but right for me, my Maurine, and I miss them. But it is more than that, I have some serious medical, emotional, professional and financial decisions to make. And I want to have control over the things I do not have control over, I want to feel safe. Everytime I turn my phone on now it tells my I am 28 minutes from Home. I haven’t updated my address in the phone yet, because I want to believe there is an external home for me, somewhere. But I know better. Then comes my help and my challenge;

Let it Be. Call her Mother Mary, Quan Yin, God or Gaiea, I have used all these and others at different times in my life, but the energy is the same. It is the same love I felt from Connie Urbanawiz, Louse Aten. It is the love I see in the eyes of the mothers whose babies I have nursed (even the big adult babies). I am surrounded and warmed by the very pure love I feel towards my children and friends, all of them. I know that everything will be alright. However it looks, it will BE alright.

So many miracles around me, so much love, so many opportunities to make lives better around me, in that, the service of others and the creation of art, is all my real happiness.

Namaste my friends.

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